How is Geck feeling?
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Please note: I am an adult, and will be sharing about adult topics including and not limted to relationships, alcohol, and other 21+ topics. I may also share about my life and emotions, but I will put a TW on anything that needs one.
Also I cannot spell get used to it 😋
2/10/25
YAAAALL I just got home from work, and literally I have to tell you about the interaction I had while walking out the door.
I used to work with children. Not sharing what context or anything, but I had a job with kids until I quit and now I work somewhere where we serve customers in some sort of manner. Anywho.
I was walking out the door when I saw one of the kids I used to work with. Immediatly when they saw me they turned and hid their face from me, which I thought was odd. They were with their friends, and I knew all of them I just didn't remember any of their names
except one, so as I was walking out the door I said hey to them, and they mumbled "suup" under their breath LOL. I thought that was really odd, until I thought about it and realized... THEY MIGHT'VE BEEN STONED LOL. Just thought that was so funny, like they think I would
care now that its not even my job. Hell, IDK honestly even when it was my job I only cared during the times I was being paid to care. Outside of those hours, its really none of my buisness unless someone is getting
physically harmed, and in my opinion, that doesn't qualify. Kids are gonna do it no matter what, and Telling on them
isn't going to stop a kid from getting stoned.
Hard drugs are different, but I don't think I have the right to tell anyone anything about weed, it wouldn't feel right. UNLESS its during the times I'm being paid to care, then I am an
ASSETT. I know how all kids hid everything. I was the worst type of kid at the end of my time in high school. I skipped so much school, and if I was in school I was high, about to get high, and occasionally drunk. But mostly just not there.
And so I know exactly what tricks kids use not to get caught, because throughout my entire time at school, I never got in trouble or caught once. I can proudly say that the only time my teachers ever caught on
was when I just stopped going to class. And I never got detention or in trouble, and then I fully got out of it because covid hit and school was cancelled.
But even before that, I would fuck around in class, not pay attention, do literally everything that everyone around me was getting in trouble for, and somehow, never once got in trouble my whole time in school. And I genuinely mean, never. Never had to stay inside for recess, never got a lunch detention, nothing. I don't know how I did it. I think I was just nice, and did just enough work that they didn't have to get on me, and be subtle enough that they barely ever noticed me texting in class, or vaping in the bathroom, or cheating on my tests and homework.
I remember one time, I got an A on a test (or essay I cant remember) of a book that I didn't even own. I just read the spark notes on it, and I know how to write well enough that I can talk so much shit you don't even realize I have no idea what I'm talking about. I graduated high school on the honor roll solely because of covid and the fact that my school had to give everyone A's for the year.
I miss school. I want to get a chance to actually try in school. I'm smart, and I know if I'm in the right mental space I could do really really well. College is just, so scary. I feel like I have to know what I want to study for, but I just want to take random courses. I want to take art, and music, and education, and an EMT course. Ugh. I hate this shit. I can't wait until I can drive.
I ran out of simpson emotions, gonna find a new theme.
2/8/24
Okay. I don't like complaining about this because it feels very stuck up, but honestly yall, I have to talk about it.
I went to the store literally just to get ICE CREAM and I walked in and this drunk dude was talking to the (female) cashier acting all drunk saying shit
like Im a dickhead how do you like me now
but he was smiling so you could tell he was just drunk. But the second I saw that, I knew that if he saw me he would
turn his attention to me. And sure enough, he looked at me and stopped, and stared, and then said OH my god
and I'm wondering to myself if he's about to
make a comment on my piercings I dont have a fuck ton, but for the midwest I guess its a pretty decent amount
but no, he goes You are so beautiful
or some shit like that.
Then thank GOD his buddy whose checking out goes You know I actually thought you were a guy and I was wondering why he was saying that to a dude
LOL and just ranted about that, thinking back I think
he was just trying to take up time until he was done being rung out so he could get his friend out of there lmfao. But IDK man, I'm just kinda done with this shit.
Growing up, I got hit on occasionally by strangers, but it wasn't really a super common thing. And guys around me liking me?? No fucking way. But in the past like 2-3 years, thats drastically changed. The reason I went to that store is because the one across the street I work at and I have a coworker who has a crush on me and is always saying shit. Nothing crazy, but I have a boyfriend, and its just so hard to dodge those situations. I'm terrified I'm going to say the wrong thing to the wrong person and set them off. But on my way home from the store, I realized that it is much more likely to have someone follow me home eventually than not, especially because of how much this shit happens. I had a guy run across a street and start walking my direction just to talk to me. I had some dude offer to give me a ride, and when I said no go around the block to find me again and ask again. It can be scary dude. And on one hand, I want to get some protection, but on the other, what if I pull out pepper spray and miss them? Or misjudge the wind and spray myself instead. What if I pull out a knife and in response they pull out a gun? There are no good options.
I miss my shaved head lol. Less people would pull this shit if I didn't have hair lmfao. Or maybe not. I get this shit at work too. Not usually a ton of creepy people, we have one dude that comes in and is creepy, but he's creepy towards all of the younger girls. Super nasty. The genuine compliments are really nice though, I've been told twice now that I look like Taylor Swift. Which I do not agree with, I honestly just think its because I'm blonde lol. And a decent amount of soccer moms tell me I'm pretty which is really reallys sweet. I know it takes a lot of courage to tell someone that straight up, and it always feels really really nice. This is your sign that if YOU ARE A WOMAN key words here IF YOU ARE A WOMEN (I feel like its obvious but going to put this anyways woman means a woman identifying person :) ) it feels so nice to hear that shit. Men, I'm sorry, but it just feels creepy, no matter your intention.
HOLY SHIT YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE THOUGH?? People asking genuine questions about my piercings. Older people will come in, and ask something that seems silly to me
like what do I do when I have a cold, or asking how badly a specific one hurt, and I love to answer their quetions. My motto will forever be I would rather you ask
a genuine question than assume the wrong thing
I've been driving still too. I'm hopeful I'll do well on my test on the 19th, its coming up. I just need to work on parking, but I looked up one of those driving instructor videos on Youtube and it gave me some really good tips. I just need to go wider. I also need to make sure that I'm looking when I'm merging, out the window and over my shoulder. I just hope it goes okay, I've heard that the test in my state isn't hard, but we'll see. If I fail I fail, its alright and I can try again another time after some practice. But I just want to try the test so that I know whats on it, that way I know what to practice for. Because right now I'm going off of google and my boyfriend who took the test in a different state 8 years ago LOL.
1/28/25
Therapy was hard today.
1/27/25
Midnight again LOL but its fine because I close tomorrow. After therapy in the morning I can go back to sleep if I need to. I did some shit with the site tonight, I'm starting to get really bored of the layout again though... I want to add more STUFF it just feels so blank. I also need better photos and shit, but I don't want to keep stealing photos off of Tumblr and Pintrest. I also NEED to do my driving rant page because I have SO much to blab about, I just don't know what I want it to look like.
My mood has been really up and down lately. I know I'm supposed to get my period soon and so this is probably just PMSing, but it'd be easier to handle if I didn't go up and down all the time, just right now its quicker. Like normally I'm up and down every couple of days, but right now its SO much ughhhh. I just want to actually experience a stable mood lmfao. I don't think I ever have, and its so frustrating. I also do have to say, I wouldn't experence all that I do if I wasn't bouncing around all the time. A blessing and a curse
my cat is trying to lay on my lap help goodnight
1/26/25
I want to do so much with this site, but I am SO TIRED UGH I spent all day doing stuff now its 5pm and I am finally home and I have so much I want to do tonight that I'm just sitting here stuck. I had my cats see each other and hang out face to face, and it went ok. My resident cat was chill actually, which was not what I was expecting. She is so tiny compared to my new cat who is a GIANT to her, but she honestly just wanted to hang and play, even showing her belly a couple of times. But he was not having it, he just kinda sat there and stared at her. His ears were forward, but his fur was a little puffy and his eyes were dialated I think. I just want everyone to be friend.
Anyways IDK what I want to do. I honestly want to listen to music, maybe I could draw. But I also don't really want to use my brain. I wish I had a good book to read. I could download one on my iPad, it just feels so not like reading on a screen lol. We'll see.
1/23/25
GUESS WHAT TIME IT IS?? Midnight!! When else would I blog lmfao. As always, the date I am putting on here does not match the actual time, because to me it is still the same day.
Anyways.
Had yesterday AND today off, and I only work tomorrow and the day after and I get another day off!! I was thinking about adding a hyperfixation info page onto the writing section of the site, and you can click on the pics on the homepage to get striaght to their writing, or obviously it'll be in the navbar. I also obviously want to upload more art, but I've been having some creative block this week idk, maybe about to go down into a depressive episode. I guess I might've been on a high last week, I never really notice it until I start going back down. Also anyone who ever reads my Blogs should know that I have a therapist named Yvn (Obviously not really their name but I do have a therapist) so I know I can sound off my rocker sometimes, but not only do we meet once a week and I take therapy EXTREMELY seriously, but they also have the link to this site and (I think at least) sometimes reads my Blog.
I've been staying up so late recently, my sleep schedule is fucked. But also, there is the mindset that time isn't real and also the mindset that I'm never getting less than 7 hours of sleep which is still in the recommended sleep time. I've just got so much stuff I want to do on my days off, and theres never enough time for any of them.
I'm singing at Mass again this Sunday, and I genuinely need to learn my songs. I just got them today, so I don't have a ton of time. And I did not do perfect last week tbh... but its fine because that day the homily and Bible stories were all about forgiving yourself for small mistakes, because not only are we bigger than our mistakes, we are bigger than ourselves. Pretty fitting and calming. And there was a sweet dude in the front row who I think got reminded of his daughter by me, and kept encouraging me. Felt pretty nice.
Anyways, gonna upload and head to sleep. Again, if literally anyone is reading this, thank you. Its so cool to see I have over 1,000 views, and 3 followers. I love posting on here and updating it as I go through life. It feels so personal, so mine, yet I am so happy to share it with anyone who happens to come across here. Have a great night yall, and I'll see you soon!!
1/21/25
IDK if any of yall have checked out my about page recently, but DUDE I am so happy with my choice of music LOL. I've literally been obsessed with that song for years, I want to find another sea shanty to speed up and replace my song I have on my blog. I also want to find a cool punk song to put somewhere on here.
I've been thinking about quitting my job a lot recently. Okay if I'm being honest, I've thought about starting my life completely over again. I think I have a hard time with being the same person for years on end, I need to switch it up and do something different. I'm thinking about getting my subbing license whenever I get a drivers license, that way I can choose whether or not I need to work that day. I am very lucky that I am financially covered to be able to be flexible with work, because I think I would be so much happier.
And its not like I'd never work, I do love working and I would LOVE LOVE being a sub, I just think I need more time off than a couple of days right now. I'm just so tired of feeling like I'm surviving, not living.
OHHH and my mother asked to see me, shit I haven't even checked if she responded to my email back. Wait here imma look
NOPE no response. Lets just hope she didn't see it and she isn't planning some elaborate manipulative email back like she normally does. IDK if its
delusion, but it almost seems like her and I are on an OK terms??? I use OK very lightly, I wouldn't compare it to
a typical OK
mother child relationship because I haven't seen her since she tried to make me
piss on a mason jar on the porch (long story, maybe I can write stories about my real life on the writing page lol) but we've been having like
ok text convos back and forth. Shes sent a few pictures, I've shared a few accomplishments, she even
gave me a couple recipies I can try. But I always have to be on high alert, because shes currently asking me to
come see her after 6 months ago I had to block her after she harrassed me nonstop for 2 months because I called her to wish her
a happy mothers day and asked if she'd like to see me for my birthday. If I get an
email or text back at like 3am I'll know she's not happy with my request to take some time to think about if I want to
come down or not to see her.
Either way, I do think I'm going to come into town in April, if only to celebrate my favorite holiday-420. I don't live in a legal state anymore and last year was lowkey depressing, and this will be my first truly legal (in some states) 420. Anyways its like midnight so imma find a mood photo and sign off. Have a good night yall.
1/20/25
YALL
1/16/25
YALLL
Sorry I've been so MIA, I hate how busy life is. Its currently midnight, and I'm only up because I've been wanting to do this for days, but I never found time. Anywayssss, I added a new page!!! to post some digital art I've been working on. I bought an iPad second hand last weekend as a reward for myself for getting my DRIVERS PERMITTTTT and actually working on driving, and I am so happy. I have always wanted to buy an iPad to draw on, but it always felt ridiculous to buy a whole iPad just to draw on when you can draw on paper, but its a whole different skill set. When I get paid I'm going to buy the animation version of Procreate so I can start animating too. I'd love to do like animation YouTube videos or something. IDK, either way I'm having fun now and thats all that matters. I hope yall are doing good!!!
1/02/25
HAPPY NEW YEAR YALL!!!
I have no idea what else to add to the site. I honestly need to suck it up and write some shit, I have a pretty cool story idea too. Its from the perspective of a cat, and they get a new cat sibling.
12/30/24
Everything is so much rn lol. Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I just feel like I never have enough time for the shit I wanna do. I have New Years off, I'm really hoping to add some to the site. Is there anything y'all would wanna see?? I kinda wanna go out and add some pictures, ooh or write a poem to post. I just feel like my poems are gonna be really emo lol.
12/25/24
Really drunk but HI YALL!!! MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just had to come on here and tell yall I got a FUCKING CASSETTE RADIO PLAYER THING!!! I am genuinely so happy about it. I got it from my boyfriends stepdad and he got me a FUCK ton of cassettes too with it. Its this CD and cassette and radio player. I've been listening to the tapes since I got home and its just so awesome. Everything for the radio thing is from 2007, but the tapes are 80's and 90's regge and rap. AND I got a keyboard from my fucking boyfrined too!! IDK I try not to make this holiday about things, and its not even the things, its that I didn't ask for any of this specifically (except the keyboard lol) but everything else I got people got me because they knew me well enough to get me something I absolutely love without me having to ask about it. They just thought about who I am as a person, and got all of this for me. And I'm just so grateful to have people who care this much about me.
Anyways Merry Christmas yall, if you think that you dont have anyone that
loves you this Christmas know that 1 I do because if you're listening to me yap
we're already best friends, and 2 that I was in your shoes for so many Christmas'
,I always related with Moe's Holiday tradition
, but this year, and actually for
3 years in a row now, I have felt so much love. And I truly thought I was the most
unlovable person on this planet before that, who was destined to be alone. So maybe,
next year will be different. Either way, the best advice I ever got was Create your
own new holiday tradition
.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!
12/24/24
HOLY SHIT ITS FUCKING CHRISTMAS EVE YALL!!!!!!
I worked all day and am not really doing anything tonight lmao, but I am actually so excited for tomorrow!! Not only do I just fucking love christmas, but I actually am excied for my present??? Really weird haven't felt like this in a long time, I have no clue what I am getting. I know I'm getting a ton of shit from my boyfriends family which is so cute. He said that they wanted to make sure I felt like apart of the family this year which I just just so sweet. And I am so excited for the shit I got my boyfriend and his family. I just hope they all like it. Anyways, MERRY CHRISTMAS if I don't update tomrrow.
I want to spend some more time editing stuff on here, but other than fixing layout adjustment shit I'm lowkey running out of ideas.
12/22/24
In a pretty bad depressive episode right now I think. At least I hope its depressive and not something worse. I can just almost feel my sanity slowly slipping away. I wish I had insurance dude and could go see like a psychiatrist or something. I have a therapist and hes awesome but we do virtual visits, and it would be nice to see someone in person. Or maybe it would be nice to see a stranger, someone who doesn't already have ideas on whats going on based on what I've said in the past, and is just focusing on my current symptoms. Also my back randomly started hurting last night and I'm convinced that my brain symptoms and my body pain are connected and I am dying. I also need to see like a medical doctor lol. I've just got so much wrong with me right now lmfao, I'm hoping its all emotional and just due to the holidays and once the holiday season passes then it'll all get better. But we'll see.
12/20/24
Ugh I close again today. And how its going to work is theres only going to be two of us for the last hour. I honestly don't think it will be bad, as long as a specific person is not working. If they are...its going to be a long long night.
I feel like I don't do anything but work. I'll have one or two days off, but is that really enough time to do what I want to do as a human?? Like fuck man I just want to live the life I want to live, and fuck this is not it. One of the reasons I am working so hard to get my license is so maybe I could van life soon. I've been starting to save up money, and while it is still not much AT ALL, I haven't touched it even when my checking was out/in the negatives. Maybe I can just not touch it for a long time, and then use it to van life for like a year. I'd want to do it alone though, so I'd need to figure out long distance with the bf. Like he could come too, but I just want my own van. I just need to feel some freedom that I don't know if I have ever felt in my life.
12/18/24
I've got a lot to say today so strap in
Today was actually fucking bonkers dude. Like actually bonkers. First I had one of the most
difficult customers come through today. They didn't hurt my feelings or anything which is
really nice, they just got me GOING. First they wanted to check and make sure their bottle
sizes were correct, so they checked and NOPE not the bottles they wanted. They ONLY wanted small bottles
so okay, I go and do the small bottles. Then they didn't like how I put the cap on the bottle so
okay they fix the caps. At this point, I have a long ass line of people behind them but thats my problem
not theirs so I let them take their time. Then they don't like how the label is printed on the bottle. Well that one is a
hard problem to fix. See we had already tried to print a new label for them, but the system wouldn't let us unless we
refund everything and start over. I tell them we are able to re-print the label, but
it would take 20 minutes. They didn't like that answer. Then they wanted me to tell
the GIGANTIC FACTORY that makes the labels to CHANGE THE INK IN THEIR PRINTER.
I don't know how powerful you think I am but fuck I'm not that powerful. The whole interaction
they just complained about shit completely out of my hands. BUT silver lining,
this was the first time I had dealt with a more diffucult customer on my own since I'm new,
and I was able to prove to all of my coworkers that I can handel myself. At one point they asked
if I was going to tell the factory about the ink, and I said I'm only going to answer questions about your purchase today
which I was SO proud of. Because honestly, I'm not the one. I've been around children my entire life, I have the whole
Only answering questions that I need to
down to a SCIENCE.
I got a lot of reminders of my dad today. We don't really talk. I'm actually texting him right now,
but I haven't seen him in years and I don't expect to see him for the rest of my life honestly. And our
conversations are always very professional
. you know talk about the weather and shit like that. But
they were playing Mele Kalikimaka at work today, and that was one of my dads favorite christmas songs, if not
his favorite. So whenever I hear it, I hear it in his voice 😔 . And then this adult father daughter pair came in,
and something about how they were just being so sweet with each other just made me think about how I will never
go shopping with my father again. The closest he will ever get to buying me something ever again is sending me money
and me using it for something. I don't know. I was always SUCH a daddys girl. Like the definition. And its just
sad when I remember that I will forever be a dad-less daddys girl. IDK.
On the bright side, I think I'm creating a really awesome relationship with my boyfriends step-dad. First off he's
awesome. I really really enjoy spending time with him. And I have always felt this little Father Daughter
relationship with him but I never knew if it was only one sided. Come to find out, that
he has spend 2 weeks working on ONE (1) of my Christmas presents.
Genuinely this shit makes me wanna cry.
Because tell me why my boyfriends step-dad is spending more time thinking about one of my Christmas presents than my actual parents have ever spent on my Christmas in my 21 years of life.
12/17/24
Had therapy today, and dude it was weird. I've had this therapist for like 3 years now (i think more but math is annoying) and so at this point we know each other really well. He kept giving me this face and asking werid questions. I know thats a therapists job, but I can tell he's currently wondering about something, but he doesn't want to tell me what because he knows I'll take it and run with it. So he's just asking his little questions and leaving me to figure out why. Rude if you ask me.
I think I might be about to go like cookoo for coco puffs. Like I'm always a little bonkers, but recently I've felt like I'm about to go off the rails. Honestly my goal right now is just to stay out of the psychward for the holidays. I honestly wouldn't mind being in there for them, but I know it would be really sad for my boyfriend, so I'm just going to hold it together until at least then.
TW MENTIONS OF ED AND RELAPSE
Currently relapsing just a lil in my ED. Nothing crazy, just a little bit, but its happening lmfao. I've just started having my little routines and shit, idk it can be so comforting sometimes. I talked with my bf about it a little, he's always so curious about my ED. And I get it, when I was stuck in an EDNOS phase for years, I was always so curious how people actually developed true ana, it just seemed so impossible. And then one day, I just was able to do it. So weird.
END OF TW
Anyways I'm going to go drink my coffee and watch some YouTube. I don't work until 3 today, which is so strange and I lowkey hate it. Only because I don't have a routine yet for the days that I work so late. But I'm trying to start one today part 1 is that I'm not allowed to think about getting ready until 12:30 or 1. Why do I need to start thinking about getting ready when my job is a 2 minute walk from me?? Ask my therapist idk man.
12/16/25
I have spent so much time on the layout these past couple of days, but man
I am so happy with it. At first I didn't want to feel like I was copying
other peoples layout with the whole container thing, but then I realized that everyone
did it because it made it the easiest to adjust, and especially made it easier to
make it not look awful when I minimize the screen. My only issue is the FUCKING
LOGO driving me actually insane I've just decided to leave it so that if it were to
look weird it just goes away. I honestly have no idea what to try next and my brain is fried dude.
Anyways I wanna look around for a cool background to put it, I kinda want it to be a gif.
Theres this really really awesome star background gif on Spacehey that I'd love to use,
but that feels so not creative or original at all. So idk. If you see my page with that cool
sparkly star background everyone has, just know that I realize how corny and lame it is. Its also really
pretty and the exact vibe I'm going for here. Not my fault.
Its midnight so I guess the 17th, but I don't think that feels right lol. I'm not sure
whats going on in my brain recently. It's never felt linear
but it's been pretty
different recently. I have therapy tomorrow which is always nice, but I close at work and
I honestly HATE having time in the mornings rather than the evenings. I'm just not used
to it, therefor I don't have a routine and feel like I'm treading water in the middle of
the ocean. I need to sleep, gn yall. If there is anyone actually reading these,
thank you so much and I am so sorry LOL.
12/15/24
YALL I have today off WOOHOO!!! Only one day off this week but its ok. Still happy I get to spend today doing whatever the fuck I want. I got to sleep in which was so fucking nice. I'm thinking about uploading true stories about my life onto the writing page, I genuinely have so many ideas for that page, I truly love to write. I want to reformat everything and make the banner different, but I honestly just don't want to spend so much time doing that. Anyways, Christmas is coming up and I FUCKING LOVE CHRISTMAS its my favorite time of year. It honestly has nothing to do with the actual holiday, I just find something beautiful in how it seems like no matter whats going on in the world, everyone comes together to celebrate all of the holidays surrounding December. All of the stores have the same music playing, toys are in every store. The vibes surrounding Christmas are IMMACULATE I just wish we could spend more time celebrating all of the other holidays for people who dont celebrate Christmas so everyone could feel this happy. Anyways I hope y'all are having a great day so far, Im hoping to spend time on here today.
Okay it is almost 12 and I work tomorrow I think??? At 11??? But since I don't have the app I'm always nervous the day after a day off. Anyways night yall!!!
12/13/24
I feel like I am about to be manicccc wooooo. Thinking about adding a password protected blog spot on here. Kinda forgot this was going to be a place where I shared everything about myself, now I have two coworkers who know about this site. One of them I don't mind knowing everything, but the otherrrrrr... I dunno lmfao. Also both of you don't ask which one you are, because I wont tell you 😘 Anyways, I have a story I want to upload on here that I wrote a while back, but I truly have no idea how I want the page oriented LOL. Probably gonna check around on Neocities and see if I can find some good ideas. Is that ethical?? I'm not like copy and pasting code or anything, just getting design ideas, but it still feels kinda icky.
OH yall so one of my managers gave me Saturday (tomorrow) off, and I have a feeling she thinks she was doing me a favor because I work Christmas Eve, but I don't think she realizes that I like working Saturdays, mainly because I babysit on Saturdays as well, and if I work there, then I still get two full days off where I don't work, but if I don't work, then it counts as one of my days off and I only get one actual day off. Idk definently a first world problem, but its still causing me distress today lmfao. So anyways I'm babysitting for seven hours on Saturday and UGH I'm hoping the kid is chill and we can just vibe, but I haven't ever watched him alone for that long and I think he's gonna get bored really fast.
YALL i am so irritated people suck so much. One of my managers can be SO MEAN DUDE ugh I hate people that are just rude and refuse to talk about things. Makes me miss my old city where everyone was so scared to hurt someones feelings that they talked about literally everything lol. I've been thinking about splitting my tongue, I wonder what the pain would be like.
12/11/24
I have a bunch of stuff I want to add on here, I'm hoping to get a chance on Sunday to spend some time on here, it's just my only day off this week so I might end up needing to spend it doing something else 🙄
12/10/24
Been having a hard time finding motivation to do anything, in a bit of a rough space honestly. I feel like I need a break, some time to just sit and do what I want to do. Or maybe thats the opposite of what I need right now.
12/7/24
We lost a rat last night, Noodle. He was the best Noodle. Always was happy to be pet, happy to see us, greet me at the cage. He is already dearly missed. RIP Noodle.
12/6/24
Yall my cats would not let me sleep last night. Im in the process of doing intros still, so one stays in the bedroom one stays in the main of the apartment. The one in the bedroom (Manny) does this thing where he'll poke my face and head while I'm sleeping to wake me up, and then meow in my face. Genuinely, so frustrating. And then the other cat (Kittysaurus) screamed at the door all night. Point being- I am exhausted and I have work in two hours. Ooh also I made an apointment at the DOT to get my PERMIT YESSS. Yes, I am 21 years old with no license. Go ahead. Laugh.
(later)
Work is killing me today. I think I am having focal seizures, but I do not have insurance so nothing can be done yay!!!!! I am so tired. Today hasn't been horrible, but my good coworkers are leaving for the day so I will be stuck with the harder to work with ones until I get to go home in 3.5 hours. Why can't I just be a housewife. Or win the lottery. I hope y'alls days are going okay.
12/5/24
So I had a couple entries in here, and then I decided to
completely reformat everything, and didn't think to save
the previous entries. I've had today and yesterday off from work,
and being autistic, once I gain interest in something I have a very
hard time putting it down again, so I have spent a lot of time trying to
make this site look nice. I recently realized though, that this site is
for me, and so it doesn't have
to look any way, other than the way
I want it to. So thats pretty cool.